Mrs. California United States 2015

May 1, 2015

Hearing my name called after the words "...and our new Mrs. California United States 2015 is..." was an unbelievable moment for me.  It was bitter sweet.  I had thoroughly enjoyed and savored each moment leading up to that crown.  Each year I learned something new.  Each year I met more AMAZING women.  Each year I got to know the California sisters a little better.  It wouldn't be the same ever again, but it would be incredible!

Hugs and pictures, hugs and pictures, and more hugs and pictures...and suddenly I was standing with my sisters in an elite sorority called Mrs. California United States for a photo I'll cherish forever.  As of April 12, 2015 I was finally one of them.

Mrs. California United States and Mrs. United States.  So honored to join the sorority!

However, that final moment was hardly the entire picture as the entire weekend was full of incredible memories.  After orientation, I sat down on the hotel bed for a moment to sort through the gifts we'd gotten from Janice, Crown Charisma, and various sponsors.  In a stack of paperwork was an envelop with a little gold stare on it.  I opened it and unfolded the paper only to feel very confused as to why a picture of me at the Mrs. California United States 2013 pageant was right there in the middle of the letter.  I looked at the envelop again and back at the letter...it was addressed to the delegates of Mrs. California United States 2015.  I began to read.  By the time I made it to the signature, tears were sliding down my face faster than I could brush them away.  I was overwhelmed.  Julie Bannerton shared how much my life had impacted hers and had encouraged her.  This is what pageantry was about to me. 

Erick turned around to see what I was up to as I'd become so quiet.  He looked startled and asked if I was okay.  I couldn't speak so I simply handed him the letter.  He read it and looked at me.  He was quiet too.  I nodded and gave a little smile.  After looking at me for several moments, he spoke, "I think I finally get why you do this."  I nodded again...I still didn't have words.  He said, "You're making a difference."  Another tear slid down my face.  I couldn't say anything yet.  I'd always hoped that I could impact people for good, but still felt amazed that God would do such amazing things with my life.  I sat for a moment longer and prayed that he always would.  It wasn't about me anyhow...it's about sharing compassion, grace, and love.  I fail at it so often, but I'm so encouraged when I see that God has worked through me in spite of how human I am.  This was one of those moments where I got a glimpse of him using me to impact them.  Thank you, Julie, for encouraging and inspiring me in such a special way.  I'll never forget your kindness.

As I prepared to go to the pajama party, I made a decision to be there in every way for the women around me.  Life, to me, is so much about relationships and being in the moment.  I wanted everyone around me to feel safe, cared for, and important, and, for some reason, pigtails seemed appropriate.  It's not something queens generally do, but then most pajama parties don't have photographers either...lol!  Chantea had the brilliant idea of sharing stories with each other.  Laurie Solomon Long coaxed a story out of me...she has always been amazing!  It was so beautiful and fun sharing our hearts, lives, and hilarity with each other.  Of course, I can't share since what is said at a Mrs. California United States pajama party stays at a Mrs. California United States pajama party.  ;)

Rehearsal was fun as I got to know each contestant a little better.  Their encouragement and stories of inspiration were so amazing.  I can still vividly see them in my mind and feel the love for each moment.  Interview was incredible.  I had more fun than I'd ever had in interview.  The judges were amazing!  I was sad to leave. 

Headed to Interview and family pictures.

One last rehearsal and the show would commence and we would soon know who the reigning queen would be.   I decided last minute to switch shoes so that I could be a little more comfortable when I got a huge hug from the first pageant judge I'd ever been interviewed by in 2009, Sean McCurdy.  I knew I'd come a long way when we talked about that first interview.  He had always encouraged me to never give up.  Wow...what a journey. 

I got the phone call that my swimsuit was ready.  My husband had bought all the tools and supplies to bling my swimsuit for me.  For three days, while I rehearsed and competed, he painstakingly hot-glued Swarovski crystals to my swimsuit.  My trust in him was so great that I didn't even open the box until it was time to put it on...and whoa!  It was incredible.  I smiled...I couldn't ask for a better man.  He'd been there with me for this entire journey.  Now, I couldn't let him down.

I looked out in the audience.  Friends and family who had faithfully supported me year after year were waiting patiently as they talked together with great anticipation.  How blessed was to have them there?  There are no words.  I couldn't let them down either.  I was determined to give it everything I had and walk away without a single regret. 

As a group of us waited back stage for the signal we formed a circle to pray.  Each woman around me helped me out all along the way.  Whether it was some glue to keep the swimsuit in place or letting me know if I needed some tucking before hitting the stage...(Thank you, Laurie!) they helped me out.  We all looked out for each other as sisters would.  As I went out for on stage question, they gave me some encouragement.  I felt so honored and humbled by their willingness to help me at every turn.  Their hearts are so beautiful.



Photo by Jim "Woody" Woods ~ Mrs. California United States Class of 2015

 

Everyone had walked the stage and shared their heart.  As we lined up for the finale, the awards for Mrs. Congeniality, the Civic Award, and Photogenic.  The first two awards were called to great rounds of applause and then the shock...Mrs. Photogenic goes to...  I was ready to begin my applause, but it was...me.  I know shock must have registered on my face because I felt it.  The woman who had half of her face reconstructed in emergency surgery was winning photogenic?  I could hardly believe it, but then I did believe that beauty was more of internal thing...still photogenic?  What an honor.  I'm still reeling over this.  I truly have no words.



Photo by Jim "Woody" Woods

As each place got called and I had been given the title.  I looked over at Erick and saw that he was glowing.  We'd done it...finally.  I tried so hard not to cry, but it was inevitable...after a six year journey it's just hard not to.  As the weight of the sash settled on my shoulder and was draped to my side, I felt the great responsibility that had been bestowed on me.  I have been given a gift beyond measure, a unique opportunity to touch lives, and the responsibility to lead with compassion, grace, and love.  As the crown was set on my head, I sensed that my life had been changed forever.  I had been given a great honor and with that honor has come great responsibility.  I hope and pray every day that I will be worthy of that honor in every way and that every life I touch will be for the greatest good.  To God be the glory.

My husband giving me the roses, kisses, and love he gives me...even when I didn't win.



Top five...truly amazing court ~ authentic, kind, and gracious!

The totally fun judges for Mrs.California United States 2015

Why Do I Run for the Title "Mrs. California?"

July 25, 2013

This question is so closely tied to what motivates me in life, what gets me up every morning, and what makes me who I am.  So I guess I'd be answering all of these questions at once when I answer why I run for the title of Mrs. California...

First of all, I love people...they are without a doubt my area of expertise in life.  I have been through many different fields of work, explored several opportunities, and tested my desire to pursue certain careers to the point that many people were left scratching their head in wonder when they glanced through my resume.  Their question was often, "Soooo....what do you want to be when you grow up?"  At first I would laugh and tell them I was still asking that question.  I wondered why I hadn't found solace in any of my amazing opportunities I'd been given until one day I discovered a common thread.  I loved people and I especially loved communicating with people, but, by far, what I loved most was helping people get somewhere they wanted to be, inspiring people to be the best they could be, and motivating people to find healing spiritually, mentally, and physically.  With this in mind, I finally realized that being a life coach was truly and without a doubt what I wanted to be when I grew up.  Well, I'm happy to say that I am seeing that dream realized now!

Originally I began running for Mrs. California because I saw it as a way to motivate myself as I relearned to walk and talk correctly again after experiencing traumatic brain injuries that left me with a struggle and confusion.  It also gave me purpose as I gave a voice to people who didn't have one.  It meant no curling up in the corner, but getting involved and about doing something meaningful.  I experienced two more traumatic brain injuries after I began running for Mrs. California, which left me starting from scratch each time.  I decided to relentlessly pursue rebuilding myself into who I wanted to be while pursuing recovery.  I continued to run in spite of the bumpy road my journey was taking me down. 

As my brain healed, the confusion began to clear, and I was able to express myself better, I found that my love for people and the desire to make their lives better was as strong as ever, but I wasn't sure how I would mesh it all together since I had no desire to tell my story.  The last thing I wanted was people feeling sorry for me, labeling me, or catering to me because I was struggling through this unique injury.  Unfortunately, I was looking at it from a perspective that wasn't very helpful and I stumbled on so sure that people wouldn't give me a chance if I told them what happened to me.

After sensing that God wanted me to tell my story and hearing many people convey their desire to hear my story and then their desire for me to tell my story to others after hearing it, I finally agreed to.  To my surprise, most people accepted me for who I was and wrapped loving arms around me without labeling me or treating me with pity.  Through telling my story, I began to see hope light people's eyes and hearts and realized what an incredible opportunity I had been given.  What I thought had taken my dreams away, instead brought me to a destiny beyond my wildest imagination. 

The next time I ran for Mrs. California, I had something urgent to share.  I couldn't wait to share hope with the people around me who had been devastated by a brain injury whether they themselves had experienced it or their loved one had experienced it.   Suddenly my path to self rediscovery had turned into a journey of healing for me and those who had experienced something similar.  Becoming Mrs. California was no longer just a personal journey of discovery, but rather an opportunity to share hope with hundreds, thousands...who knows? ...maybe millions. 

One thing I knew for sure was that I wanted to help people and becoming Mrs. California was definitely a way to do just that!

 

 

 

Speaking at the BrainSong -The Micah Jones Foundation "Rock the Walk" Event

July 13, 2013

I am incredibly honored to partner with BrainSong - The Micah Jones Foundation, a non-profit organization that  helps women with traumatic brain injuries learn to live "life with new lyrics".  I got invited to speak at their annual Rock the Walk Event in recognition of Ohio's Traumatic Brain Injury Awareness Day, an event focused on raising awareness of the effects of traumatic brain injuries on women, encouraging fellow survivors, friends, and family as well as speaking on their behalf across the nation.  After being helped through some of my darkest days by Micah Jones, BrainSong, and those connected with this foundation, it is an incredible honor to be able to give back in some small way what I have been so graciously given.

 www.brainsong.org/

 

The following statistics are directly from the BrainSong website:

Every 15 seconds, someone in the US suffers a traumatic brain injury. Of the 1,000,000 people treated in hospital emergency rooms each year, 50,000 die and 80,000 become permanently disabled because of traumatic brain injury (TBI).

Brain injuries occur more frequently than breast cancer or AIDS.

One out of every fifty Americans is currently living with disabilities from TBI.

An average of 561,000 females suffer traumatic brain injury each year.

Division of Injury and Disability Outcomes and Programs National Center for Injury Prevention and Control Centers for Disease Control and Prevention Department of Health and Human Services www.cdc.gov/injury October 2004

 

 

THE TRIP OF A LIFETIME

 

With tickets in my hand, my husband helped get my luggage out of the car, and kissed me as I wrapped my arms around his neck and told him tearfully that I would miss him.  Walking into the airport, I turned around and waved.  As usual, he was waiting for it and waved back then pulled away from the curb to avoid having security tell him to.  My heart dropped and then  began to speed up...I was really headed to Ohio to see my friend, Micah!  Her and her organization, BrainSong had come to mean so much to me.  Soon I would find out just how many lives she'd inspired, but for now I was settling into my seat for the flight.  I wished so much that I could see Monterey Bay as we took off, but to no avail.  It was too cloudy to even see the ground.  * I love to fly as you probably figured out from my skydiving post...if you saw that blog entry. :)

Landing in Ohio, I got to see Micah in person for the first time.  We both squealed and ran over to each other, which became rather humorous since I was dragging my suitcase behind me through the cars weaving around each other trying to pick up their own passengers.  We got my suitcase in the car and went to pick up Hank.  He was so excited to see her - it was awesome how he danced around with all his heart.  Hank is an Irish Setter whose hair perfectly matched mine...lol!  We became instant buddies.  (The next day when we went out for breakfast, Hank posed for some pictures with us in the car.  He was so precious!  When I sent one of them to my husband, he instantly replied that Hank really liked me.)

That evening I met Micah's family.  They were all so kind.  Micah's brothers had just flown in for the Rock the Walk event as well.  It was very apparent just how much they loved each other!  I was exhausted and still recovering from my fourth traumatic brain injury early this year in May, but I wouldn't have missed it for the world!  I was nervous.  Everyone wanted to know what I planned to say at the event.  Whew...well, I had my script ready since I was struggling to remember things once again, but I was a little nervous about speaking to people who had been through so much.  How did I know they'd been through so much?  Because a traumatic brain injury of any magnitude disrupts a person's life and those around them in ways that can hardly be explained.  As I prayed about it, I decided that I would stick to the script, but convey my heart with all it's compassion. 

We All Changed Our FB Banners to This Picture on July 9th

The day came and I was struggling a bit with putting myself together with so much humidity.  My hair was trying to curl while I was trying to keep it straight and it finally ended up in a pony tail, but I decided to forget about how I might look and be in the moment.  We headed out to the high school stadium. I met person after person...it was incredible and delightful...and a little overwhelming trying to remember all those names. 

As the event began, we were all handed sunflowers to celebrate our survival.  A tribute to a fallen TBI comrade was played by their family members as we soaked in the preciousness and, sometimes taken-taken-for-granted, fragility of life.  I began to ponder all of the fears I had overcome to live out loud every day.  I was glad that I chose fearlessness rather than curling up the corner, which would be much easier for sure.  I looked at the sunflower in my hands and realized just how significant it really was.  We weren't just celebrating being alive, we were celebrating living out loud.  It takes so much courage to be a part of the world after being damaged so badly.  There is definitely a time for healing and sometimes limitations beyond our control, but to see a row of survivors who had overcome so much to sit at this event moved me beyond words.

 

I swallowed hard as tears threatened to pool in my eyes.  I was blessed to be here and incredibly honored and humbled to speak into the lives of all these people...  "Lord," I whispered, "help me speak what they need to hear."   Micah said a few words and it was my turn.  I walked to the platform.  My legs seemed more confident than my head, but I stood before them, took a deep breath and I began to sing.  Oh...yes...I forgot to mention that they asked me to sing too.  It was  the first time since my vocal cords had begun to heal that I was going to sing.  

In 2008, when my face was crushed and reconstructed, I didn't know it, but my dreams had been crushed as well.  I have insatiable and beyond humungous love for music...especially singing.  I'd been singing since I was...well, born...at least that's what my mom said.  She said I sounded like I was singing when I cried...like I was making a melody, "Ling, ling, lu..."  It was destiny because just after my grandmother gave me a piano at seven years old, I started voice and piano lessons. I would sing in groups, sing solos, sing and play the piano at the same time, I would sing in plays, I would sing for state competitions and eventually international competitions.  My college even offered me the opportunity to sing in their exclusive chorus as a representative while traveling the country.

There was no doubt in anyone's mind that I loved to sing so there was no major surprise when I got the opportunity to audition in Nashville for some of the biggest record labels in the country back when getting audition sight unseen was almost unheard of.  At 5'10 and with both a modeling and acting career in full swing, the word was that I was going to make it big in the music industry.  I began recording, but then headed off to the U.S. Army.  After meeting my, now, husband Erick in 2005, we made plans for our future as we worked toward marriage in which I was going to write, sing, and finish recording while he became my manager however we could while we served and then after we got out of the military. We were super excited about the plan...and then while in surgery in 2008, my left vocal cord was damaged.  I didn't realize it until I tried to sing again.  My voice was not the same.  My music dreams were official crushed.  This was one of my great bonds with Micah.  We both love music and both had our dreams of being in the music industry crushed by a traumatic brain injury.  While our stories are quite different in how it happened, we both had to deal with crushed dreams. 

So...why was I singing now?  In March of 2013, my doctor began to help me with an infection that lingered in my head since the surgery in 2008.  One day I went home and began singing in the shower.  I was stunned - I sounded like I used to sound before the surgery!!  I didn't say anything to the doctor because I didn't know how it had happened.  Then one day while he was working on me, he said that he hadn't wanted to tell me sooner because he didn't want me to get my hopes up, but my left vocal cord was starting to vibrate recently and that it hadn't been vibrating before that!  So here I was singing the National Anthem as a veteran and survivor of many things.  It didn't sound perfect and I was so nervous about it, but I was grateful that I was on my way to singing again!

As the last note came out of my mouth, I paused and heard it echo around the stadium.  Wow...I suddenly felt so small and big at the same time...and mostly amazed by what God was doing with my life.  I paused and looked out at all the expectant faces, took another deep breathe and began to share a little of my story.  As I thanked the survivors and the supporters for participating and inspiring me and those around them by showing up, I saw their tears.  I was amazed that as the still broken person that I was, I could make such an impact.  As I turned to walk off the stage, I whispered, "Thank you, Lord."  Micah's mom gave me a nod and said, "great job."  I was so happy she was pleased by the outcome as she had invested so much time and energy in putting the event together. 

We walked the track to songs us survivors had picked out and talked with people who'd come to support BrainSong.  It was hilarious, fun, and...exhausting...lol!  Now that I was done singing and speaking, I could relax a little, but talking was almost more than my brain could do.  After a short break, all the survivors headed out for pizza where we got to know each other better.  As I heard their heart-breaking stories of survival and, now, struggle, I wished that I could help them all heal somehow, but the best I could do at the moment was be a friend.  It was in that moment that felt a strong urgency to find a way to help survivors with whatever means I could muster.  It's such a hard place to be - knowing what you want to communicate, but struggling to do so, knowing you're intelligent if you could just remember what was said thirty seconds ago, and trying to catch on to what's going on around you, but getting overwhelmed and exhausted instead!

Since I was still trying to recover from my most recent traumatic brain injury due to a balance issue that sent me down a flight of stairs and left me without my vision for a bit, it was really hard to absorb everything and keep up with everyone.  Still, without a doubt, it was a worthwhile experience.  Micah's family treated me like family - including me in all of their activities.  I was so honored to be a part of such a sweet and bonded family even if just for a few days.  Each one of them left indelible memories on my life and heart that I'll never forget!

Thank you, Micah and the Jones family, for making me feel at home, loved, and worthwhile!
Thank you for giving me the incredible opportunity to be a part of something so amazing!

"In Her Own Words"

June 29, 2013

It was a big day for me as an advocate for TBI and PTSD survivors.  I got invited to speak to Stanford and Department of Veterans Affairs Medical Staff about the effects of traumatic brain injuries and post traumatic stress disorder on U.S. military veterans.  I was incredibly honored and humbled to be a part of such a huge endeavor and ground-breaking work. 



The Invitation that was sent out for the day I spoke at the Department of Veterans Affairs

 
There really are no words for some things and they remain difficult to share for many reasons, but I'm finding that the hope I see light up fellow veteran's eyes in finding out that a new way of life is possible makes it worth the struggle.






Dr. Carmelinda Mann, fellow Army veteran - Sharron Young, Me (Rachel Chapin Martinez), Dr. Odette Harris, and Dr. Joyce Chung (from left to right)

After surviving multiple traumatic brain injuries and a brain tumor, I know what it feels like to walk through the dark alone wondering if there was hope for a life that mattered.  That feeling of despair and then the hope I gained after sharing with others gave me a burning desire to make sure that no other veteran ever feels that way.  I pray that I can continue to share hope with the nation as well as the world. 

 

 

I'm so grateful to all involved in this project for giving me the opportunity to share my story and as a result, finding healing I never could have imagined!

It was at this event that Dr. Carmelinda Mann let us know that our videos are now officially part of the National Smithsonian archives.   We also found out that the Pentagon and the Department of Labor has seen our videos and shed tears.  Wow...I have no words for such an honor and I feel so incredibly humbled by this amazing opportunity to make a difference in people's lives! 

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10152396307368158&set=vb.248662598157&type=2&theater 

What Brain Injury Survivors Want You to Know...

May 19, 2013

When I saw this article, I was amazed by how accurately it conveyed the feelings that became all too familiar in the struggle to recover from traumatic brain injuries...

 

Lost & Found: What Brain Injury Survivors Want You to Know

Barbara J. Webster, Lash & Associates

 

I need a lot more rest than I used to. I’m not being lazy. I get physical fatigue as well as a “brain fatigue.” It is very difficult and tiring for my brain to think, process, and organize. Fatigue makes it even harder to think.

My stamina fluctuates, even though I may look good or “all better” on the outside. Cognition is a fragile function for a brain injury survivor. Some days are better than others. Pushing too hard usually leads to setbacks, sometimes to illness.

Brain injury rehabilitation takes a very long time; it is usually measured in years. It continues long after formal rehabilitation has ended. Please resist expecting me to be who I was, even though I look better.

I am not being difficult if I resist social situations. Crowds, confusion, and loud sounds quickly overload my brain, it doesn’t filter sounds as well as it used to. Limiting my exposure is a coping strategy, not a behavioral problem.

If there is more than one person talking, I may seem uninterested in the conversation. That is because I have trouble following all the different “lines” of discussion. It is exhausting to keep trying to piece it all together. I’m not dumb or rude; my brain is getting overloaded!

If we are talking and I tell you that I need to stop, I need to stop NOW! And it is not because I’m avoiding the subject, it’s just that I need time to process our discussion and “take a break” from all the thinking. Later I will be able to rejoin the conversation and really be present for the subject and for you.

Try to notice the circumstances if a behavior problem arises. “Behavior problems” are often an indication of my inability to cope with a specific situation and not a mental health issue. I may be frustrated, in pain, overtired or there may be too much confusion or noise for my brain to filter.

Patience is the best gift you can give me. It allows me to work deliberately and at my own pace, allowing me to rebuild pathways in my brain. Rushing and multi-tasking inhibit cognition.

Please listen to me with patience. Try not to interrupt. Allow me to find my words and follow my thoughts. It will help me rebuild my language skills.

Please have patience with my memory. Know that not remembering does not mean that I don’t care.

Please don’t be condescending or talk to me like I am a child. I’m not stupid, my brain is injured and it doesn’t work as well as it used to. Try to think of me as if my brain were in a cast.

If I seem “rigid,” needing to do tasks the same way all the time; it is because I am retraining my brain. It’s like learning main roads before you can learn the shortcuts. Repeating tasks in the same sequence is a rehabilitation strategy.

If I seem “stuck,” my brain may be stuck in the processing of information. Coaching me, suggesting other options or asking what you can do to help may help me figure it out. Taking over and doing it for me will not be constructive and it will make me feel inadequate. (It may also be an indication that I need to take a break.)

You may not be able to help me do something if helping requires me to frequently interrupt what I am doing to give you directives. I work best on my own, one step at a time and at my own pace.

If I repeat actions, like checking to see if the doors are locked or the stove is turned off, it may seem like I have OCD — obsessive-compulsive disorder — but I may not. It may be that I am having trouble registering what I am doing in my brain. Repetitions enhance memory. (It can also be a cue that I need to stop and rest.)

If I seem sensitive, it could be emotional lability as a result of the injury or it may be a reflection of the extraordinary effort it takes to do things now. Tasks that used to feel “automatic” and take minimal effort, now take much longer, require the implementation of numerous strategies and are huge accomplishments for me.

We need cheerleaders now, as we start over, just like children do when they are growing up. Please help me and encourage all efforts. Please don’t be negative or critical. I am doing the best I can.

Don’t confuse Hope for Denial. We are learning more and more about the amazing brain and there are remarkable stories about healing in the news every day. No one can know for certain what our potential is. We need Hope to be able to employ the many, many coping mechanisms, accommodations and strategies needed to navigate our new lives. Everything single thing in our lives is extraordinarily difficult for us now. It would be easy to give up without Hope.

Created with the assistance of the "Amazing" Brain Injury Survivor Support Group of Framingham, MA.

http://www.brainline.org/content/2011/07/lost-found-what-brain-injury-survivors-want-you-to-know.html

Thankfully this doesn't have to be the end...there is always hope for complete recover.  While it will happen differently for each unique situation and individual, I believe this can be helpful information as a person takes the journey to wholeness.

More Than Just A Pageant

April 18, 2013



 

Arriving at the pageant, I wasn't sure what to expect, but found so much more than I could have hoped for at the Mrs. California United States Pageant April 11-13, 2013.  I met some of the most amazing women I have ever met.  Those I got to know were selfless servants who cared about way more than themselves.  They were fun and down-to-earth.  I had never experienced so many beautiful women in one place being sweeter.  



Mrs. Monterey Bay ~ The beginning of weekend filled with fun & adventure!
(Photographer - Todd Sipes)




Arriving At Mrs. California US
(Photographer - Joe Pier)

I wish there were words to describe how absolutely amazing this experience was.  What impressed me the most was how happy for me they all were when I won the People's Choice Award for Mrs. California United States...

their congratulations were sincere and sweet!  These women were helpful, encouraging, courageous, and strong...truly unforgettable. 

Pajama Party and Gift Exchange Thursday Evenging
(Photographer - Joe Pier)

Award Banquet Friday Night Before the Show
(Photographer - Joe Pier)

Nor Cal Girls Snapping a Pic Before the Show Begins

  

 In reality, I shouldn't have even been able to enter this type of pageant and suddenly became overwhelmed by the gratefulness I felt at being able to participate in something so amazing.  You see, my face had been crushed in 2008 to the point that on the flight to another state with medical assistance, everyone openly stared  at me.  I knew I looked deformed.  My brain and body were too injured for me to be concerned yet about my face, my eye that was bleeding, or my jaw that I couldn't chew with.  However, when it came time to have emergency facial reconstruction surgery and I had to sign on the dotted line that I was psychologically sound enough to be deformed for the rest of my life, the reality settled in.  For me walking across that stage was a much bigger event that just entering a pageant...it meant that I had been the grateful subject of a miracle.




On Stage with Mrs. California 2012
(Photographer - Joe Pier)

Mr. and Mrs. Monterey Bay
(Photographer - Joe Pier)

  I walked away from this amazing event with my heart soaring.  You would have really thought I had won the crown because I could not stop smiling and glowing!  I just didn't want it all to end.  After the commotion died down and everyone went their ways, I felt like Cinderella at midnight after the ball...it had been magical and now we were all headed back to life as usual...other than the fact that, for me, life is never usual.  I had spent three days savoring every moment.

Roses from my beloved husband and a picture with some of my amazing new friends.
(Photographer - Todd Sipes)

 

 Thank you.  Thank you had been tattooed on my heart since the day I was so graciously reconstructed to, not only to look normal, but to look like I used to...

Thank you, Dr. Burt Fabisoff, for spending time at the hospital with me for hours working on my face!  There are just no words to describe the impact you've made on my life, my livelihood, and, as a result, the lives of others.  I will always be indebted to you and will never forget your compassion. 

In at least a hundred ways...you are my hero!

Posted to Facebook...

While I didn't take the crown this weekend at Mrs. California United States, I met so many very amazing people and had the time of my life doing so! I also felt incredibly honored that the state of California and many of you across the nation voted for me to be the

People's Choice for Mrs. California United States.

I am very happy to be the queen of people's hearts and so excited to give my charity of choice, BrainSong - The Micah Jones Foundation, the funds that were raised through the voting!
You're vote is now helping women with traumatic brain injuries learn to live "life with new lyrics".

From the bottom of my heart, Thank you!!

~ Rachel Martinez, Mrs. Monterey Bay United States

 

On The Radio

April 10, 2013

 

My sponsor and friend, Nancy Erfan of Beautiful Spa in Monterey, CA, and I began talking while she gave me my first professional facial.  Not only did she revolutionize my entire skin care regimen, she became a good friend.  Every time I saw her, I was surprised to find just how many talents she had up her sleeve.  As she heard my story about how I began the journey to where I was as a spokesperson, advocate, and title holder as Mrs. Monterey Bay, she let me know that I needed to share my story more publicly.   I sent her my bio and out it went to all the local media and onto every social network.  As soon as the biography of part of my story went out, I received a phone call from the local radio station...could I go on the air for 10 minutes?  Absolutely.  The radio host began asking me more about my story and decided that maybe I should go on for 15 minutes and then started thinking that maybe...hmm.  I told him I was available for the hour. 

The next morning I got a call at 8:35am and began the interview.  At 9:05 I was off the air and totally amazed that I had just been able to share so much with my fellow Californians.  How exciting to be a part of something much bigger than myself.  Here is the interview...

A Little About Me

April 5, 2013

When I joined the United States Army in 2005 as a Soldier, I was given the jobs Interrogator and Linguist and began studying Arabic in Military Intelligence.  By the time I left the military in 2008, I had a partially paralyzed left leg,  a traumatic brain injury, heart failure, and a brain tumor.  Just days after leaving the military while planning my wedding, the left side of my face was completely crushed and had to be reconstructed in emergency surgery after the internal bleeding was under control.  My left eye was barely salvaged.  Pins plates, and hundreds of stitches later, the journey to recovery had just begun.  I had to relearn many things and the doctors told me there were many more things I would never do again, but I now have a sky diving video...(http://tinyurl.com/l8uf76n) and just learned that my left vocal chord has started working again March 26, 2013, after being damaged in surgery in March 2008.  I will sing again! 

 By the time I experienced my third traumatic brain injury, I finally began to share my story.  I thought that sharing my story would give me negative labels that I'd rather do without and was stunned to find the opposite...my story encouraged people whether or not they had experienced a traumatic brain injury.   Events I once thought would keep me from my dreams, instead became the exact events that led me to a destiny beyond my wildest dreams of telling my story to people across the United States of America...a story of tragedy conquered by a refusal to give up.  Though I have partnered with many charities, I now speak on behalf of people who have survived traumatic brain injuries to bring awareness to our invisible injuries by speaking at events throughout the state of California and across the United States of America.  I do not have enough words for how honored and humbled I feel to even be able to do this.

I am also collaborating with Stanford University and The Department of Veterans Affairs to educate medical staff, encourage fellow women veterans who have experienced traumatic brain injuries, and raise public awareness about the effects traumatic brain injuries have on female veterans by telling my story.  The digital version of part of my story is also going into the National Smithsonian Archives and is viewable below as well as on You Tube at the link below the video...

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PlfrBSjNv4k

My personal journey to recovery has been long and difficult at best, but I have learned so many things along that way that have allowed me to empathize with people, especially women who have been through or are going through difficult life experiences.  I have also learned about many holistic ways to facilitate healing from traumatic brain injuries such as nutrition, brain remapping, natural therapy, and music.  While complete healing is always the hope we harbor, knowing that some of the effects of my three traumatic brain injuries have lingered for longer than I would like, I understand that healing is not always possible, complete, or immediate, but by raising public awareness, those who come to understand it better can help a traumatic brain injury survivor live life to the fullest, press the boundaries, and have hope for tomorrow.
 

As Mrs. Monterey Bay, I am encouraging survivors and raising awareness, not only in California where I live, but across the United States by sharing a story of triumph...my story of over coming incredible odds and finding hope in the dark.

If you would like to contact me to speak at an event, please e-mail me at holographique@live.com. 


Sincerely and with lots of love,

Rachel Chapin Martinez
Mrs. Monterey Bay

An Amazing Opportunity to Make a Difference!

March 22, 2013

Just got a call from Micah Jones of BrainSong the Micah Jones Foundation this morning!  She had been telling me she wanted to talk to me about something and we'd been corresponding for some time now, but I had no idea what she would end up asking me this morning at 8:00am.  I hadn't actually pondered what she might ask or say since we had been talking pretty candidly and developed quite a friendship...I just figured we would talk about the journey we'd been on toward healing.

The night before she called me, March 21, 2013, I chose BrainSong ~ The Micah Jones Foundation as my charity of choice as I ran for the People's Choice for Mrs. California United States.  I hadn't told anyone and up on the Mrs. CA US site it went.  So when I got a call the next morning I was stunned that Micah was asking me if I would come to Zanesville, OH to participate in their 2nd annual "Rock the Walk" event.  My heart was skipping everywhere; I was overwhelmed by how the events had been orchestrated to come to this amazing opportunity...and unbelievably excited!  I thanked God for his mysterious and amazing ways.  He had put it in my heart to make BrainSong my charity of choice and I was overwhelmed that He already had something even bigger in motion.

 

 

Responding to the invitation to participate in the "Rock the Walk" event with BrainSong

 

Several years ago while working at a camp in Northern WI for the summer of 2000, people began to tell me that I would speak to a lot of people...especially women...and I would tell my story to encourage and inspire them.  I was NOT excited...that was the last thing I wanted to do!  I had always run from anything that would reveal who I really was or the tragic events I had been subjected to in life.  I often wondered who in their right mind would want to hear about my personal tragedies.  I had been through such a truly horrific and confusing life in so many ways that people were often surprised that I didn't have a severely skewed view of God, but through a series of unique events and loving people, I learned that He had plans for me...even if I didn't like the sound of them yet, it was comforting to know He was there for me and wasn't leaving.  Still, I struggled with this possible destiny.   It was a miracle that I had actually begun to share parts of my life story at all, but I had watched it help people and encourage them to overcome crises and, sometimes, incredible odds, and I realized that it would be selfish of me to keep that kind of encouragement to myself...and so I continued to share one on one or in small groups.  Little did I know how much more I would go through and have yet to share.

The more I shared parts of my story, the more people told me this was my destiny.  After some more college, a nice paying job, and then a major detour/series of tragic events (which I may share at a later time), I began to feel unbelievably restless and a little disoriented.  I sensed the nearing of my destiny and still didn't want anything to do with it.  I was terrified of sharing my life in a public format.  I decided that I should serve my country and joined the Army as a Soldier in the field of military intelligence in 2005.  I figured I could suffer behind the scenes and alone and no one would be the wiser.  I now had an excuse for not being public about my life. However, after falling apart physically...partially paralyzed left leg, traumatic brain injury, heart attack, and brain tumor...I realized that this career wasn't looking very good for me.  Three years later I left the Army definitely worse off than I entered.  By the time I experienced my third traumatic brain injury in 2011, I finally began sharing some of my story.  I was stunned to find just how much it inspired people and encouraged them to overcome whatever difficulty or tragedy they had encountered in life.  I wasn't even better yet, but I was on my way and the fact that I wasn't going to let it get me down seemed to inspire people.  I was amazed I could help anyone.

I realized, then, that sharing my story was not as scary as I thought it would be and I was never given the labels I thought would have to bear.  My story was no longer just my story...it was a life line, a message of hope, a courage to lend people in crises or difficulty.  I began to speak to more and more people and each time I doubted that this might be my calling in life, someone would show up to let me know that I should share my story with still more people.  A man even showed up at the gym in spite of not really wanting to be there and let me know that God told him to tell me that I should share my story...what!?  Wow...I couldn't even go to the gym without hearing about this destiny I was so unsure about.  I was still holding out in spite of all the clarity until one night in particular really made an impact on me and helped me understand that this calling was for real and I needed to take it seriously.

My husband called; his mom was in the Intensive Care Unit at the Hospital in Las Vegas where she had been life-flighted to.  We gathered some belongings and set out from Monterey to see her.  It was late when we arrived and were relieved to find that she was improving.  As we talked with the ICU nurse, my past traumatic brain injuries came into the conversation and she really wanted to know more.  I was a little hesitant at first since I wasn't used to just sharing my story with people I didn't know at least a little...it just seemed so risky, but I shared while she just stood amazed.  She asked me to connect with her daughter.  I told her I would be happy to, but didn't for a while. 

When this nurse's daughter, Kaylea, and I became friends, we began talking some about our experiences with our TBI's and the struggles we went through and were still going through because of them.  As we built camaraderie, she began to encourage me to share on a bigger platform and to become an advocate for women with traumatic brain injuries.  I wasn't so sure I was ready for that, but began to think it over.  She sent me jewelry she made as part of her therapy to heal and a book to exercise my brain among other things...so supportive and encouraging.  She also introduced me to friends and groups that helped women with their struggles to recovery from TBI's.  I was stunned to find so many people who were going through the same kinds of struggles I was going through and felt encouraged...just knowing I was not alone was healing in and of itself.  Kaylea never stopped encouraging me to be an advocate...she believed in me when I struggled to believe in myself. 

One day I saw her connection with Micah Jones and BrainSong and knew that everything about this foundation mirrored what my heart was saying.  I instantly wanted to participate!  I even offered to somehow do something in California that would help with the foundation in 2012, but it was not meant to be...yet.  I continued to support what they did and corresponded more and more until March 22, 2013 at 8:00am when I got the phone call that made my heart sing!  Would I be willing to participate in person and partner with the foundation?  Yes, yes, yes...if there was any bigger way to say "yes", I would!  I'm overwhelmed that God would allow me to be a part of such an amazing work and fill a role that has helped, and I believe will continue to help, so many women recover their health, joy, and hope.  Humbled, I pray that I will be a blessing as I feel more blessed than I ever dreamed I could be. 

P.S. Thank you, Kaylea and Micah, my fellow TBI survivors, for making such an amazing impact on my life by encouraging me to walk in my destiny with dignity and might...you're friendship means more to me than I have the words to convey. 


Micah Jones 

http://www.brainsong.org/         

 

I can hardly wait to share pictures of a successful "Rock the Walk" event on behalf of BrainSong and all the women who have survived traumatic brain injuries!!

 

 

*See "Speaking at the BrainSong - Micah Jones Foundation 'Rock The Walk' Event" post for an update.

WAR Party - Preventing Human Trafficking and Providing Women a Way Out

March 16, 2013

WAR Party


The day has finally arrived and I'm so excited I can hardly sleep!  I've invited everyone I know and prepared everything I can think of to have a successful WAR party.  My husband is ready to help me too...he's even gone to get the snacks for those who show up! We've partnered with Women At Risk International http://warinternational.org/ to fight modern day slavery by hosting a jewelry party.  This jewelry isn't just any jewelry though.  It's made and sold by women who are at risk of being trafficked as well as those who have been rescued from trafficking.  Making and selling jewelry provides them with a way to support themselves and their families thus keeping them from the clutches of those who seek to exploit and enslave them.    This is such an amazing opportunity to make a difference in the lives of women and their children...and all the generations that follow as well as the lives of people they interact with along the way.  The smallest involvement is still one step toward ending today's slavery. 

So many people find it easier to pretend it's not happening today and yet, according to Interpol, there are more slaves today than ever in the course of history.  Modern day slavery is real and everywhere...even in your state no matter which state you live in! 

Opening the boxes of jewelry and setting them out on display was really awe-inspiring.  The jewelry, scarves, purses, perfume bottles, children's things, and decorations were exquisite and worth much more than they were priced.  I was stunned to find such an array of items from pearls and gems to gold, silver, and fabric jewelry.  Each piece was obviously meticulously crafted to perfection.  Selling this jewelry would be a piece of cake!

March 17. 2013

We've decided to make it two days due to the level of interest!

Well, I'm happy to say that today was a huge success!  Several people stopped by and bought jewelry, donated, or both.  My husband even set up a table at the local supermarket to hand out information and sell some jewelry, which he coordinated and set up himself as I was unable to attend due to previous commitments.  I met new people and saw those I knew well - it was a fun and friendly affair with a great purpose.

Want to host your own party?  Give them a call!  Party with a Purpose!!





See the post called "Joining the Fight to Stop Human Trafficking" to read about my personal experiences with human trafficking and how I first got involved in the fight against human trafficking.